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05-Nov-2017 21:23

I simply could not spare it this woman just didn't get it, she kept harassing me ELAINE 3 squares!! JERRY well, you know, sometimes a square is everything ELAINE a ply? JERRY yeah (Elaine picks up the wireless phone and presses for the tone) WOMAN'S VOICE ON THE PHONE then we'll get a cab and we'll do it in the back seat.. too bad they don't have those old ladies walking around with flashlights anymore we'd flush her out JANE I don't know what she looks like JERRY I wonder where Elaine is sitting? hey I'll make some sandwiches, what what do you like? alright buddy, take it easy Kramer you down to it George? cause it it's two-ply I'll take one ply, one ply, one, one puny little ply, I'll take one measly ply JANE look, I don't have a square and I don't have a ply (flushing and leaving) Elaine no no, no no, don't don't, I beg you (the movie theater) JERRY (eating pop corn) hmm I love this artificial flavoring I like it better than butter I think it's more consistent JANE you would not believe what just happened to me in the bathroom JERRY what? TONY my popcorn, you were supposed to get me popcorn what? ELAINE you would not believe what just happened to me in the bathroom JANE I mean.. (Jerry's apt.) (Jerry's at his computer) (Kramer enters) KRAMER hey JERRY hey KRAMER hey guy, can I use your phone in your bedroom? KRAMER look come on, let me use it, 5 minutes, I'll pay you back huh? I looked for you, I didn't see you ELAINE I looked for you too, I was all the way over on the side JERRY oh with huh.. Tony ELAINE yeah JERRY hey hey (fooling around with his collar) ELAINE yeah, all right ok JERRY Tony, hey hey (continues fooling) ELAINE that's nice. ELAINE so I ask this woman in the stall next to me for some and she refuses! JERRY yeah ELAINE so listen, what happened last night with Jane? choked on a jujube (Jerry's car) ELAINE you know I hate to tell you this, but it's time to defrost that freezer JERRY I know, I just can't bring myself to do it meanwhile that freezer keeps getting smaller and smaller (she smiles) (Elaine looks at her watch) oh, don't wanna keep Tony waiting ELAINE hey you got a problem with Tony? George is like a school girl around him (Monk's) TONY so I said huh..

Take This Superfan Quiz Talking to the Seinfeld Writer Behind ‘Yada Yada Yada’ and ‘Double-Dipping’ Breaking Down the Multi-Billion-Dollar Seinfeld Economy In the interest of both helping novices prioritize and reminding veterans about forgotten jewels, we've ranked every episode in the series from worst to best. An episode so racially offensive that NBC had to apologize upon its airing, the second-greatest crime that "The Puerto Rican Day Parade" commits is simply not being funny enough. After four seasons spent using George's homophobia as a character flaw, the show wholeheartedly embraces gay panic as a plot device to a nonsensical, largely unfunny degree. "The Deal" packs at least one comedic punch — Jerry's birthday gift of 2 cash to Elaine — but this brief rom-com digression (which includes a seemingly out-of-character coffee-shop convo between Jerry and George about Elaine's sexual prowess) disrupts the considerable creative gains made at this point in the series. The introduction of the story arc where George's parents consider getting a divorce — complete with a cameo from a cape-wearing Larry David, as Frank Costanza's lawyer — provides more laughs than the titular woman. This is mostly a comedown episode following George's rushed engagement to Susan. Elaine singing "Witchy Woman" to her unamused boyfriend Brett is an inspired moment. What begins with George bungling a pilot deal with NBC after staring at the cleavage of the network honcho’s daughter ends with Elaine using her cleavage to manipulate that same boss into resurrecting the deal. This two-parter is a spiritual predecessor to "The Muffin Tops" in that its zany concept — driving across state lines to cash in recycled bottles for more money — goes so off the rails that by the end of the episode, you barely know what you're watching. whatever GEORGE alright alright, I gotta buy some bread TONY yeah yeah, you know I'm definitely down for some rock-climbing GEORGE me too, I am down, I am totally down, mark me down TONY cool, so what do you say we climb a rock manyana (tomorrow in spanish)? KRAMER maana I'm doing nada TONY what do you say you scale some rock with me and George? there's not gonna be too many sandwiches TONY c'mon Kramer what do you say? gonna be pretty dangerous up there KRAMER I am down TONY yes.. Huh you know I think they charge me if I cancel with only one maana's notice (Kramer enters) TONY hey Kramer KRAMER hey TONY hey, hey Kramer my man, what are you doing maana? ELAINE can you throw this trash out (closes the door) (Jerry's) (Jane is giving Jerry a massage) JERRY I've been waiting a while for this. or is it so possible your heard is spinning like a top? or is your entire world just crashing down all around you? (Monk's) ELAINE he's supposed to get the bandages off on Sunday.. but he's my mimbo, you know even if he is a hideous freak maybe, maybe I can learn to love him, maybe in some final irony (Jerry is looking the other way), I'll learn what love really is. hey (walks by Jerry and Elaine's table) it's all set JERRY what's all set? JANE I sell paper goods you jerk JERRY paper goods? JANE I'm sorry, I can't spare it, there's not enough to spare (Elaine realizes) JANE where's the ladies' room (Kramer points her) ELAINE I have to go to the bathroom too (runs to be ahead of Jane) (the bathroom) JANE oh damn ELAINE something.. JANE yeah there's no toilet paper out here, I usually check but would you mind?

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ELAINE you know (acts like a monster) JERRY oh you're afraid he might look like Zippy the pinhead ELAINE yeah I mean, I mean what is my obligation here, you know we were just dating, it was probably gonna be over in a couple of weeks anyway JERRY oh I though you didn't care about his looks ELAINE I lied JERRY aha ELAINE are you kidding, he's a mimbo I know that.. (Kramer jumps around George from one side to an other) ECHO hello KRAMER hey George, hear that? try the yodel (chanting) yodel lay hee hoo GEORGE (sobbing) yodel lay hee hoo.. GEORGE (taking it out of his jacket pocket) yeah I got some sandwiches.. and salmon salad Tony because I know you don't like peanut butter (the ropes slides down) KRAMER what? (George and Kramer look at each other) GEORGE AND KRAMER ahh.....!! you know your breath is a little garlicky you better take some gum. JERRY yeah stinks, terrible (Elaine enters) JERRY hi Elaine ELAINE hi JERRY this is Jane Elaine ELAINE hi, nice to meet you finally JANE it's so nice to meet you (chewing) I look forward to Saturday night ELAINE yeah me too JANE ok so I'll see you Saturday night JERRY Saturday night (she leaves) (Jerry shuts the door) ELAINE what is with the gum? she puts like 4 pieces in her mouth, it's ridiculous, I don't think we're gonna be able to get together on Saturday night ELAINE because of the gum JERRY well it's too much, it's embarrassing ELAINE why does she have to chew so many? they said I'm coming along (Tony's face is covered by bandages) ELAINE but what else did they say TONY well, they said huh Tony, try to keep it clean ELAINE yeah.. "step off" ELAINE yeah, Tony says you better step off George GEORGE but..why, it wasn't my fault, I .. I make such delicious sandwiches Elaine TONY just beat it dude! JANE well maybe he's feeling better JERRY yeah without a doubt, I'm down (Kramer enters) JERRY oh hey how're you doing? JANE oh I'm going uptown too, you wanna split a cab? KRAMER I don't know, we have a certain chemistry (Jane shows up and when she sees Jerry, she walks by their table, smiling) JERRY oh my god JANE hi I thought I'd find you here JERRY hello.. (Elaine gets out and she has 2 rolls of toilet paper) JANE no, no, no!!! TONY take the rope, thread it through the carabiner and knot it, and I'll climb up to where you are KRAMER alright.. (gives him the rope) GEORGE yeah TONY hey George, you got anything to eat dude? gross deformities, major skin grafts, stuff like that TONY I really don't remember, I was kinda out of it for the 1st couple of days, I was on a lot of medications, it was kinda like haze, it's pretty cool ELAINE huh (smiles) but huh, in this medicated haze, in this woozy state, um do u recall the words.. TONY I don't know, I don't know ELAINE think Tony, think TONY I'm drawing a blank, babe (knock on door) (Elaine gets it, it's George) ELAINE this isn't a very good time George GEORGE I just wanted to talk to Tony for a minute (hands Elaine some stuff) TONY step off George, I don't wanna see you GEORGE me? You know it's a shame Tony got all banged up, we're not gonna be able to get together on Saturday night JANE that is too bad, what a shame JERRY yeah, it's a damn shame, a damn shame! JERRY alright I changed my mind, yeah I don't think I'm not gonna go now JANE well ok I'll see you later, nice meeting you JERRY what's with you? KRAMER Erika, she's Erika JERRY oh you think she's Erika, the phone sex woman KRAMER Jerry, that voice is tattooed on my brain, I'm telling you it's her JERRY oh you're crazy KRAMER am I? You know Jerry JERRY oh I'm sorry I didn't get most of that.. KRAMER Erika is gonna meet me here, now we're gonna find out the truth JERRY how's you get her to meet here? JERRY how can u say things like that over the phone? ELAINE I can't, I don't have it, I don't have a square to spare, I can't spare a square JANE wait a minute, I know you ELAINE that's right honey, and I know you!There are literally hundreds of funny food related moments throughout the series.